You'll notice a new layout. I apologize for continuously changing it up, but unfortunately, all my formatting disappears whenever I edit a post.
Week Seven
7.1 Wowza.
Nine matches in one day. All but two I closed immediately because, well... just no.
I went through and closed a whole schwack of matches, for a few reasons. Some I had been matched with a month and a half ago and there had been no communication. The other bunch I - or they - had initiated communication, but I had not heard from them in a month or more. Not really worth sitting and waiting for someone to write back with "oh hey." You know? Not that I was sitting there waiting, but I'm sure you know what I mean.
7.2 Another seven matches so far today...
So, the running total is:
"Meh" that haven't been closed and haven't had any communication initiated: 19
"Communicating" (most of whom still have not responded for quite some time): 9
Closed (either by myself or by them): 127
Which makes the "worthwhile factor" (Meh + Communicating as a percentage of the total) at about 18%. If you factor in the number of "Communicating" matches who are actually communicating... It's at 13%. If you don't consider "Meh" as a worthwhile option, and only include the actually communicating matches, well, then... we're at less than one percent (0.6% - 1/155). Awesome.
Even considering I'm only paying 33% of the regular rate for this service... I feel I'm being ripped off.
... I wonder if my lameness about determining a "Worthwhile Factor" might be part of the reason I have such a low worthwhile factor... I mean, I wonder if any of my matches would go so far as to sort that out? Hmmm... Things to ponder.
What kills me, though, is that I'm not being particularly stringent with my requirements - in my humble opinion, anyway. You may disagree, but you know what? This is my tale, so what I say goes. *sticks her tongue out at reader* I don't think it's too much to ask that you can spell the words that are included IN THE PRE-WRITTEN QUESTION correctly.
"What is one thing you are most passionate about?"
"I'm most pasionite (sic) about my dogs."
*head thumps*
Copy and paste. Again, if you're not a speller, no biggie, but if the word's already there for you? Use the tools you're given.
Criminy.
7.3 So another seven matches today. I'll check em out after work.
One thing I am definitely learning in this process is how much of a raging bitch I can be. I wouldn't have thought it - though I occasionally pretend to be a full-blown, lettered, card-carrying bitch - but I've found that ambivalence breeds a wee bit o' hostility. I'm fully aware that my reaction to various foibles reflects more on me than on the person with the foibles, but meh. I'm trying not to make the decision to close a match based on appearance or spelling or eloquence. Unfortunately, there's not a whole heck of a lot else involved in this process!
You are shown a photo - sometimes, it's not a requirement - and you get to read people's answers to various pre-written questions. Personally, I don't believe that *le sigh* two hearts can touch one another through the (previously selected by an anonymous third-part) prose of the interwebs. I know, call me a luddite, whatever, but I'm a little more old-fashioned than that (ehm, and probably not romantic enough to buy into that idea). So this service offers communication! Fabulous!
... Provided both parties communicate.
But rather than focus on what is unappealing about most of the matches I've closed, let's focus on what - about me - is potentially unappealing to my potential matches. (all sorts of "potential", but we need something to kick it into kinetic, people - it won't be me doing the kicking, that's for sure. Stupid weather changes.)
ANYWAYS!
In my "Personality Profile" I have highlighted that I enjoy reading, writing (rithmetic... lol), as well as photography and well, arguing. I've mentioned that I'm close with my family. I've mentioned that I have tattoos - no, no photos of them up - and that I'm looking for someone with the following traits: responsibility, passion, and the ability to let loose the inner child every once in awhile.
Terrifying? Disturbing? Utterly off-putting?
Possibly.
Perhaps the problem with online dating - sorry, "relationship-finding" - is that those who subscribe are looking for that one-in-a-million. That person who makes your toes curl (in a good way) just to see them and makes you smile just to think of them.
The issue with that, for me, is that there are multitudinous amounts of people who make me smile just to think of them. I enjoy smiling. I do it often. I don't always need to have a reason, but generally, just thinking of any one of most of the people I know can bring a grin. And the toes curling thing? shhhhh can you keep a secret? I don't know that I believe in the toes curling situation. I'm willing to be proven wrong, however.
7.3.1 Mildly off-topic, which should be expected by now, but I found out that four of my friends are in new relationships today. Ehm, not with each other, and not all started today. But new - newish, I suppose, the oldest dating back about two and a half months - that I didn't know about before today.
This is fantastic!
Though it is somewhat discomfiting to take a random survey of a bunch of my close friends and note that I am one of only three who are not in a relationship. Mayhaps I have a skewed perspective, though. Knowing what I know, about my friends' relationships - trials, tribulations, and triumphs - would I trade places with any one of them?
If so, what is holding me back?
And if not, could that be a big part of my lack of excitement over an "online relationship-finding" service?
Or does it all just boil down to the fact that though I do not necessarily revel in my singledom, I do not feel that I am missing out on anything that would make my life more more than it is now? I'm a pretty happy person - this may not be apparent through this blog - and that's the point. I enjoy my life as the friend that people can go to for whatever.
But how much rejection, disappointment, and let-down can a person take before being transformed completely from Pollyanna to Misanthropos?
Well, I only have another month and nine days before my subscription will expire... I don't know whether to hope to be served up as bitters by then, or to have survived three months of analysis.
7.4 Another seven matches - not a one of them within 100km of me. Closed all of em. None of them was within my age range, not to mention the distance.
I am not interested in people younger than I am. I thought I made this clear by starting my age range at three years older than I am. But hey, a flexible match is still a match, right?
I suppose.
Someone asked me the other day why I'm continuing with this. Aside from the fact that I'm stuck with this site until almost the end of November because I can't cancel, it's a kind of public service from me to you.
Guys? Ladies? Thinking of joining one of these online services? Well, maybe knowing what it's like from a real person's perspective - with my faults, quirks, foibles, and all - would help. Successes are important to keep in mind, but so is the possibility of failure. Complete, abysmal, soul-crushing failure.
Men - there are women like me on these sites. You've been forewarned.
Women - there are men like those listed throughout on these sites.
You've been forewarned.
7.5 Three matches. Only one of them in my province, but still a few hundred kilometres away.
What is that smell? Oh. Right. My desire to ever jump balls out into the dating pool is still sitting in that corner over there, rotting.
